Movie 43

Starring: Dennis Quaid, Richard Gere, Emma Stone, Halle Berry, Hugh Jackman & Kate Winslet

Summary: Horrible movie. If you want to be subjected to shit tonnes of cringeworthy nausea and disgust then this movie is for you. Unfunny, not entertaining and quite frankly the worst film I have ever seen.

Memorable Moment: For all the wrong reasons it would be the Anna Farris poop sketch. I've never seen anything as unfunny and disgusting as it.

Quote: (One of the only funny lines in the film) "My non-monocled eye!"

Rating: 1 excessive use of toilet humour out of 10

Les Miserables

Starring: Hugh Jackman, Anne Hathaway, Russell Crowe, Amanda Seyfried , Eddie Redmayne & Samantha Barks
Summary: An instant classic. This adaptation of the famous novel and well loved musical is stunning. Up for many awards at the upcoming Oscars the film is deserving of each and every nomination, but none more so than Hathaway in her role as Fantine. The characters fall into disgrace is poignantly portrayed by the actress who cut her hair and lost over a stone to show Fantine’s struggle. Her performance of one of the musicals key songs, ‘I Dreamed A Dream’ is simply magnificent. But to put all the credit on the one actor in this musical would be wrong, Jackman’s performance as Valjean is superb and newcomer Redmayne is fantastic as Marius. The one criticism I have for the film is the casting choice of Crowe on a vocal basis. His acting ability is unquestionably brilliant but he is unable to keep in key for many of Javert’s musical numbers.
Memorable Moment: ‘Do You Hear The People Sing?’. Catchy, moving and well-choreographed. This anthem  was a superbly performed.
Quote: "The color of the world Is changing Day by day... Red - the blood of angry men! Black - the dark of ages past! Red - a world about to dawn! Black - the night that ends at last!"
Rating: 9 Failed Russell Crowe-lo's out of 10

Pitch Perfect

Starring: Anna Kendrick, Rebel Wilson, Brittany Snow, Skylar Astin, Anna Camp & Elizabeth Banks
Summary: Solid and entertaining film clearly influenced by the success of TV hit Glee. Although the groups in this rely solely upon their own vocal chords rather than having the support of backing music. Anna Kendrick is believable as the rebellious teen and comedic star in another strong showing (Scott Pilgrim & How To Expect When You’re Expecting) proving that it was her character in Twilight which was poorly written  rather  than her acting ability at fault. Rebel Wilson is humorous as her supporting actress in her typical role as the bolshy best friend.
Memorable Moment: The four acappella groups compete in a Riff Off mixing a dozen songs in a clever and entertaining manner.
Quote:   "You guys are gonna get pitch-slapped so hard, your man boobs are gonna concave."
Rating: 7 Vomit soaked pitch pipes out of 10

Django Unchained

Starring: Jamie Foxx, Christoph Waltz, Leonardo DiCaprio, Kerry Washington, Samuel L. Jackson & Walton Goggins
Summary: Excellent film. Christoph Waltz is exceptional and hilarious as Schultz. Typical Tarantino film, a good mix of violence twisted with clever uses of dark humour. How on earth DiCaprio has never won an Oscar is beyond me. Must see film.
Memorable Moment: DiCaprio cuts his hand open during monologue and continues to perform the scene using the prop to enhance his performance
Quote:  *Shoots Sheriff* “Now you can get the Marshall”
Rating: 9 Oscar snubbed cast members out of 10

Jack Reacher

Starring: Tom Cruise, Rosamund Pike, Robert Duvall, Richard Jenkins, David Oyelowo & Werner Herzog
Summary: Good film but it could have been a little shorter. The action scenes were entertaining but sparse in number, the film containing to many talking scenes with Helen (Pike). Some great comedic scenes. Would see a sequel if it was granted one.
Memorable Moment: Two moronic henchmen inhibiting each other’s attempts to take out Reacher.
Quote: ““You think I'm a hero? I am not a hero. And if you're smart, that scares you. Because I have nothing to lose.”
Rating: 6 chewed fingers out of 10